Driving

In the wet & Cool

I enter

The Parkway

I stop

A deer stops

In the road

I wait

She waits

“C’mon Deerie”

She trots across

I enter The Parkway

What is

Your message?

You’re right,

I am a participant

In the great beauty

The great abundance

What a lucky

Man I am

The Parkway

Is untreated

And left alone

To tend to its own

accumulated ice

It made my experience

With her

Beautiful and exciting

Like a lover

Is supposed to do

Like you do

Everyday

To me

After two days of snow days, we returned to school. I was happy to be back with the teenagers so I just did my teaching thing. It was just a day so it went by quick. Then a close colleague stopped by and said, “Gonna watch some pro football this weekend?” I said, “Well, you know, with it being money games, the officiating this time of year is really terrible. I always turn my attention, this time of year, to a great rugby tournament. (Six Nations.)

I went on to tell him about the beauty of rugby and its highly regulated tackling and lot of other things that make it a beautiful sport. I assumed that, as an American, he doesn’t get the passion of these tight-knit European nations. My Welsh ancestry and Welsh cousins by marriage have helped me understand this.

The truth is that the NFL is a lot like the current political situation; the American public can be given any bucket of shit and they will look at it as the best bucket of shit they could have. They don’t question anything, they just accept it. They complain about biased officiating but keep showing up and betting on games and watching bars and buying gear and whatever they push in commercials. The league knows this and keeps on delivering the same shitty product. Because they are still making a shitload of money. I love the game but it’s not the same game I grew up on.

So, one more week, I’ll be watching Wales and France on n Six Nations rugby. Cymru!

I’m here

With love

I’m here

For a job

I’m here

For an education

Mine and theirs

I’m here

To grow

I’m here

To cultivate

My inner sage

I’m here

To pave my trail

To Paris

To get there

All you need is love

‘Cause

She loves me

YeahYeahYeah

My mind is empty

My soul is full

My mind is

In France

I want you to be

So happy

That you wanna dance

Or warm and naked

Or sleeping

Through the night

Whatever makes you happy

Your smile is my smile

Today was my second day off in a row. That is the first time since the Christmas/New Year’s holiday. So what did I do with that time off? I did get some stuff done around the house. Yes, it did help me develop habits for my personal growth, like mediating, stretching, learning Taoism, starting a Qigong practice, etc. But, most of all, it gave me some space to contemplate what is actually real.

As I woke up (or dreaming), I was thinking about whether time was a man-made construct or not. Then I started thinking about all the thought experiments that Einstein to support the notion that time could be distorted. As I was working through my day, I started thinking about the argument that we are made of atoms and atoms are made up of 98% empty space. Therefore, we are 98% empty space and our perception turns into apparent solid bodies. This led me to think about how we can only perceive a small portion of the spectrum of light. Therefore, most things are things we can’t actually see. (If they are actually things at all.) Then it made me think how so many social structures are only about getting followers and collecting many and possessions.

Feeling rather alone in these thoughts, I shared them with my wife. I started by asking her if she believed time could be altered, like when working on something she enjoys. She agreed that time seemed to warp but it was just a perception. I then mentioned Einstein’s thought experiments. She responded with, “What does it matter or do you just have fun with this?”

I thought for a moment. I really do enjoy thinking about this. But then I thought about vibrational science and how everything is vibration. And how, if you change your perception, then you change your reality.

I’m not sure exactly that works but it sure gets us closer to what’s real and what isn’t.

The search continues….

I am starting to appreciate an occasional on-descript day. However, I haven’t had many of those in a while. You see, last summer I realized that my needed to work more than my 10-month teaching job. As soon as school let out, I started a job delivering food. Realizing the detrimental wear on my car that was happening, I started working at a local Target, unloading trucks and stocking shelves. Also, while delivering food, I was offered a job working at a land surveying company. Once school started, I was teaching Monday through Friday, working on a survey crew on Saturday and worked 5 to noon at Target. That is, I was working just about every day, for months. (I thought about quitting Target but the job was way too easy. Then, last week, the let me go from my Target. Thanks, Target.)

While this started happening, I was getting more time to relax. With this time, I started getting a little lazy. My new-found organization was starting to derail. It would hit a tailspin that lasted Friday night to Tuesday afternoon. On Tuesday afternoon, I took the reins back and started putting the train back on the rails. I’m still recovering but I have felt vast improvement.

When I returned to blogging, I decided that it would be about my spiritual journey. Who knew it would include talking about snow? But here we are here I go.

Since we moved back to my birth state of Virginia in 2020, I have seen any significant snow here. I know it snows here but not that often. But we aren’t to only one getting surprised by snow. It’s supposed to snow in Florida and Chicago is going to colder than Alaska all week. A week after our big snow, our yard is still covered. And a significant amount is on its way next week.

Anyway, back to snow and spirituality. Last Friday, we were told that it would snow overnight. So how did we prepare? We went to a local taqueria for a couple of jumbo margaritas. We then passed out in our beds.

I woke up about 3 AM (hungover) and saw that we gotten about an inch. It looked like it was done snowing so I went back to bed. When I got up at 7, there was a substantial amount of snow on the ground. This made me smile.

After meditating, my invited me to walk around the neighborhood and check out the snow. So I got scarf on and put my black wool coat. (I always like the look of snow on black coat.) When we left house, snow dropping off the trees, giving a false flurry. Halfway through our walk, we were hit with a short but serious flurry. It made me close my eyes but it put a big smile on my face. I love the feeling of that. When I got home, I measured the snowfall on the roof of my car; it was exactly 3 inches.

Later in the day, I went to a local college basketball game with a work colleague and my grandson. When we got inside, my colleague bought all of us drinks and popcorn. Just after halftime, I gave my grandson his $20 and let him go get some concessions. I was surprised when he came back with a hamburger for me. I was impressed with his generosity. Anyway, the game was close and entertaining. Just as we were preparing for overtime, a home team player hit a 35-foot shot for a buzzer beater!

What is the spiritual part of this? I felt so blessed to experience such a great day as this. Besides the hangover, I felt like the luckiest man alive.

Changes are a funny thing. Most of see that we are always and it is necessary for growth. However, we, or at least I, are very resistant to change. This is an emotion I felt last Friday.

I was giving my last exam to a small class of PreCalc students. They had struggled the entire semester, trying to learn the material. If I’m honest, I struggled teaching about a third of the material. I was hoping it would go smooth and I could get ready to start fresh the next semester.

However, it wasn’t meant to be. My department head came in the rather awkwardly (but that’s normal for him.) I followed him out in the hall. He asked me why one student had his computer open. I told him that he was using a scientific calculator. He told me that it wasn’t allowed. I calm said okay. I told the class to put all calculators away. I saw the calculator kid close his laptop, close his test and shut down his mind.

I was calm on the outside and livid on the inside. When the test concluded, I immediately when up to the new teacher mentor and ranted. She commiserated, listened and promised to talk to the department head.

I then looked online at the AP PreCalc testing statement. It pretty much said the test allowed students to use a scientific calculator for two-thirds of the test.

However, I calmed down and decided to view this as part of the learning curve at this school. I vowed to myself to do better in the future.

The Monday after the test, I had a long conversation with my department head about the philosophy of the department. On some points, he held his ground. On others, he was quite flexible. On still others, he was willing to listen to some of my compromises. I felt better about the upcoming semester.

I glad I was given time to calm down and open my mind. It’s all part of the growth process.

Today was the first day of exams at the Catholic high school. It was just what I expect from any high school population; a few prepared students and a whole lot of kids trying to turn in late stuff to bring up their disappointing grades. Some even wanted me to teach some topics from scratch.

This is also the season for administration questioning my unusual teaching methods. Their approach is teacher control and student anxiety under the guise of “good pedagogy.” My approach is student choice and dependence on student questions and discussion. When I’m in trouble with administration, that means they didn’t ask for help and it gets twisted around to a complaint that I refused to help. The bottom line is that the administration wants deep information passed on in a short time space. Which, of course, is impossible., especially in mathematics.

Anyway, I am meeting with the New Teacher mentor, to discuss ideas to make parties happier. I soon discover that we on the same page, educationally. Near the end of the meeting, the conversation dips in the murky waters of religion. She is fundamentalist Christian and I am a learning Taoist. She starts talking about salvation and how she prays for me every night. I appreciate the love but makes me uncomfortable. Bottom line, it’s kind of disrespectful towards Lao Tzu and myself.

Then, when I mention my love for Rumi and Lao Tzu, she asks about me reading the Bible. She then tells me I oughta read Proverbs for its wisdom. I glanced through Proverbs when I got home ; I read it and I still prefer the wisdom of Eastern thought.

It’s going to be a long semester!